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Living Up To the Name: Bike Crash on Training Ride

30 May 2011

Living Up To the Name: Bike Crash on Training Ride

Post-disaster.
The damage was a LOT worse than it looks.

There's one thing about being the Disaster Magnet. I know the next disaster is always on the horizon. I'm usually prepared for it. The bad thing is never knowing when it's coming. I ask people all the time: "are you sure you want to ride/run/swim with me? I AM, afterall, the Disaster Magnet." Everyone laughs. They think it's funny. They think I'm being overly dramatic. They think I'm just making it up.

I'm not. I'm one of the most accident-prone people you will ever meet. I'm the walking embodiment of Murphy's Law. If you don't believe me, just ask my new biking partners. They now know.

It started innocently enough. As one of the newest members of the

My right side and hip are STILL bleeding.
I had landed on my right side and my shoulder jammed into the side of my body. I moved my arm around in circles to check if something wasn't working. The pain was bad but my arm was functional. My biggest fear was if I had cracked a rib or something not obvious. My knee was bleeding and my hip had been chewed up pretty good. Damn, I ruined my favorite bike shorts.
I assured the boys that I did not have to call my husband (their suggestion) and that if my bike was operational, I was finishing this ride... dammit!
We checked the bike. The handlebars and aero bars were out of alignment but Jason and Ed helped by shifting everything back into place and after a few more attempts at movement, I was convinced I could ride the last however-many-miles we had left. We DID witness one miracle: all three of my water bottles stayed firmly in their cages during the crash.
Unfortunately, the remaining 13 miles would involve one of the worst hills in the area during which I would find my rear derailleur was bent and could not get into the lowest gear. But I persevered and made it home while having to listen to Ed and Jason's apologies (silly boys, they thought it was somehow their fault) followed by joking that I slowed them down. (Perhaps I even did it on purpose to slow them down.)
I'm going with the explanation that this was just a simple team initiation (I think the proper term is "hazing").
When I got home, my husband Jim insisted that I go to the emergency room (he was convinced that one of my pupils was dilated). I waited a bit, got a shower and then decided he was right. My biggest fear was that I broke a bone in my arm because I couldn't make a fist without excruciating pain in my elbow (it's strange how these things come to light later). I insisted that on the way to the ER, we drop my bike off at Bike Authority - it needed a new rear derailleur and some handlebar adjustments which were completed almost instantly by the amazing Mike Vanucci (who texted me in the ER!).
After several hours in the ER and one x-ray, it was determined that nothing was broken. The doctor gave me a prescription for 800 mg of ibuprofen and sent me on my way with one warning: "the worst is yet to come." 
This knee never gets a break. It still
has scars from winter running falls.
Boy was she right. I don't think my 46-year-old body will bounce back like it could 10 years ago. Two days later, the pain is starting to shift and localize in my shoulder, chest and elbow. It hurts to breathe. It hurts to sneeze (this is very bad now that I'm in the throes of spring allergy season). It hurts to lie down. It hurts to get up. I can't even blow my nose without pain. But my knee, which hurt the worst at first, is actually feeling much better.

I took Sunday off and haven't decided if I will race the Mooseman 70.3 next Sunday. I'll make that determination in a few days after I attempt to swim and run. Swimming will likely be the most difficult - my DeSoto T1 wetsuit will be next-to-impossible to get off with a compromised shoulder. (The saving grace may be the wetsuit peelers at Mooseman - I remember they were very good.)

Ed and Jason have both checked in with me to make sure their hazing didn't knock me out for the season. They CLAIM this is the first time they have been involved in a bike crash. Obviously, these two haven't truly lived. They say I scared them when I didn't speak right away after going down. They SAY they felt bad I crashed. Bring it, guys!!!! (and they know I'm joking.)
Jim is considering wrapping me in bubble wrap until Kona.
With a nickname like Disaster Magnet, nobody knows better than me that these things WILL happen. I'm just happy this particular disaster happened in a training ride and not a race.
Tags: 
disaster, injury, bike, training, crash

Comments

Submitted by Julie (not verified) on Mon, 2011-05-30 15:09

I LOVE the bubble wrap idea !! Way to go Jim !! Hey !! Maybe we could market arm warmers made out of bubble wrap.. hmmm....

Glad to hear it was 'only' bumps and bruises.

j3

Submitted by Loni (not verified) on Mon, 2011-05-30 15:42

I happened upon your site and was excited to find that you had not only done the Ironman St. George this last month, but you also are from Cleveland. I have to say that you are amazing, you killed the Ironman and have given me inspiration to work harder - it was my first Ironman. I was wondering if you would be okay with me using your photo of the triathlon picture you took at the rewards ceramony, of the 3 stick figures. I'm updating my blog and thought it was perfect. If you ever want to kill someone in training, give me a shout, I could really help boost your self-esteem :)

Thanks, Loni
http://oneilies.blogspot.com

Submitted by Jeanne (not verified) on Mon, 2011-05-30 16:27

Thanks Loni, and sure, feel free to use that photo. I thought it was hilarious. If you need the hi-res version of it, just let me know. St. George was an amazing (and amazingly-hard) race, and I hope to go back there someday. Maybe even next year.

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